


Gone

by breelott



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon Continuation, Canon Universe, Despair, Fluff, M/M, Sad with a Happy Ending, this is what i think happened after 15.18
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:55:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27460798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breelott/pseuds/breelott
Summary: So I just kinda wrote what I want to happen after the end of 15.18. This picks up right where the episode left off, with Dean still on the floor of the dungeon.Don't pay close attention to the part about Chuck, I literally don't know what's gonna happen at this point so I just kinda threw something together. I just figured it had to be in there because that's what's going on in the show.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 99





	Gone

Dean feels like he’s been sitting on the floor of the dungeon for days. He glances down at his phone on the floor between his knees; it’s only been barely an hour. He has four missed calls from Sam, but he can’t find the energy to pick up the phone and call him back.

“Dean?” he hears Sam call from down the hall. He doesn’t respond. “Yeah, Jack, do you mind starting to dig into the lore? I’ll be right there once I find Dean.”

A few seconds later, Sam walks in and sees him sitting on the floor, his head still buried in his hands.

“Dean? What happened? I tried to call you,” Sam looks around the room. “Where’s Cas?”

Dean’s breath hitches.

“Gone,” he manages to choke out. He takes a deep breath, the first one he’s taken since the empty took Cas. “He’s gone.”

“Gone? What do you mean gone? What happened?” Sam asks again, bending down to Dean’s level.

“I mean he’s gone, Sam. And I-,” his eyes well up again. He rubs his fists into them and tries to stop the tears from falling, but he can’t.

“Come on, let’s get you up off the floor,” Sam says, pulling Dean to his feet.

Sam walks to the kitchen with his arm draped around Dean, practically holding him up. He seats him on the bench before moving to the other side to sit across from him.

“Tell me what happened,” Sam says again.

Dean sighs. He’s quiet for a while, aside from a sniffle every so often. Sam doesn’t press him anymore. He lets him take his time.

“Billie,” Dean starts after a while. Sam looks up at him. “She wasn’t the one killing everyone. She said it was Chuck.”

Sam doesn’t say anything, he just waits for him to continue.

“The gash in her shoulder that I gave her from her blade, it was fatal. She said before she died that she, uh, she wanted to see me dead. So, me and Cas, we ran. We locked ourselves in the dungeon and Cas warded it against her, but the warding wasn’t gonna be able to wait her out.”

Tears start falling down Dean’s cheeks again. He wipes at them, but it doesn’t do much.

“Cas sacrificed himself to save me. He told me-,” Dean swallows. “He told me he loved me, Sam. And the empty was coming, there wasn’t enough time. There just wasn’t enough time and I…I didn’t get to say it back,” his voice cracks. He covers his face in his hands again, his shoulders shake.

Sam looks at him with those sad, puppy dog eyes of his.

“He knew, Dean. He knew.”

Dean looks up at him.

“No,” Dean hesitates, then takes a deep breath.” He didn’t know…he didn’t know that I’m in love with him, Sam. He didn’t…”

Sam is silent for a while. He doesn’t know what to say to make his brother feel better. He sort of understands, but at least Eileen knew he loved her. He doesn’t actually know if Cas knew.

Dean lifts himself up from his seat, taking every ounce of energy left in his body.

“Where are you going? Sam asks.

Dean doesn’t answer. He just walks to his room and shuts the door.

~~

Sam does his best to give Dean his space, but with the state of the world right now, it’s proving rather difficult. Jack has been looking for a way to save Cas. He got Cas out before, he can do it again.

“Dean,” Sam says, knocking on his door, opening it before he has the chance to respond. “I know you’re grieving, but we gotta do something about Chuck. You said Billie told you he was the one taking everyone?”

Dean is silent. He’s awake, but he can’t bring himself to care about anything anymore. So, what if the world is ending? His already has.

“Dean,” Sam says again. Dean still doesn’t answer. “You know, you’re not the only one who lost someone. Jack and I lost him too and I lost Ei-,” he stops, on the verge of tears himself. He doesn’t say anything else, shutting the door on his way out.

Dean sighs. Sam’s right. He lost Eileen and Dean’s being selfish cooping himself up in his room while Sam and Jack try to find another way to defeat Chuck.

Dean walks out into the library. Sam looks up from his computer and Jack from a book.

“Dean, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean-,” Sam starts. Dean raises a hand up at Sam.

“You’re right, I’m being selfish. So, what’s the plan?”

They spend the next couple of hours going over the plan. Dean notices that Jack hasn’t said much.

“You okay, kid?” Dean says.

Jack looks up at him.

“I’m just…Cas said it would be a while before the empty would come and take him. I wasn’t expecting it to happen so soon,” Jack lowers his head.

“Wait, what?” Sam and Dean say in unison.

“You knew about the deal?” Dean says.

“What deal? What the hell are you two talking about?” Sam asks.

Dean looks over at Sam and rubs a hand over his face.

“Cas made a deal with the empty to get Jack back.”

“He what?” Sam says, sitting up in his seat.

“The deal was Cas for Jack, but not right away. The empty would come when Cas was…was truly happy and take him forever,” Dean says, his voice shakes.

“And Cas told me that it wouldn’t be for a very long time,” Jack finishes.

Sam looks back and forth between the two of them, unable to speak.

“He, uh,” Dean starts. “He said that the one thing he wanted, he couldn’t have. But that he didn’t need to have it, just feeling it, just saying it was enough,” tears start forming in the corners of his eyes again. “That’s uh, that’s when he told me that he loved me.”

Sam rubs a hand over his face.

“Why didn’t he tell us about this?” Sam says, looking over at Jack.

“He didn’t want you to worry,” Jack says. “He knew you would try to get him out of it, but he’d made peace with it.”

Jack turns to look at Dean, who’s staring down at his wringing hands.

“He did love you, Dean. I could feel it,” Jack says. Dean looks up at him.

“Why didn’t he say anything sooner?”

“Maybe because he knew he’d have to leave you if he did. And I think he was worried about losing you because part of him never thought you would ever love him back,” Jack responds.

A tear falls down Dean’s cheek as he gets up and leaves the room. He doesn’t say another word.

“Did I say something wrong?” Jack asks Sam.

“No, Jack. He, uh, he just needs time to process,” Sam clears his throat. “So, uh, what did you find in the book about the spell?

~~

The next morning, Dean comes out of his bedroom and heads straight for the kitchen.

“Alright, we ready to get rid of this cosmic douchebag for good?” He claps, walking over to the freshly made pot of coffee on the counter. He pauses for a moment, remembering all the times Cas would sit with him in the mornings while he drank his coffee. Even if Dean was acting like a grumpy asshole, Cas never seemed to mind.

“Dean are you sure you’re-,” Sam starts, but Dean cuts him off.

“I just want Chuck gone. Whatever it takes. So, are we gonna do this or are we gonna sit here and talk about our feelings all damn day?” Dean says. He raises an eyebrow at Sam, who sighs and gets up from the table.

~~

Dean, Sam, and Jack head out on their mission to kill Chuck once and for all.

When they reach the old, abandoned barn, Sam begins setting up the spell. In an instant, Michael is standing before them.

“Oh, well look who finally showed up. It’s about damn time,” Dean grumbles. “Where’ve you been? We’ve been praying to you.”

“What do you need me to do?” Michael responds.

“So, now you’ve suddenly had a change of heart? Now you’re willing to help us?” Dean says back, irritation setting in.

Michael glares at him.

“Adam is gone. What do you need me to do?” he says again.

Dean swallows, not saying anything else.

Sam steps in and brings Michael up to speed on the plan. Now that they all understand their parts, it’s showtime.

Once everyone is in position, Sam begins the summoning spell. Within seconds, Chuck is standing before them. Dean rushes him and stabs an angel blade into his back. He doesn’t even flinch.

“Are you kidding me?” Chuck turns to Dean. “I knew you guys were stupid, but I didn’t think you were that stupid. Did you really expect that to work?”

“Nope, but I did expect it to buy us a little time,” Dean says. He looks over Chuck’s shoulder at Michael and Jack, hands joined together, the both of them glowing white, hot light.

Dean and Sam run to the far end of the barn, shielding their eyes as Michael and Jack finish their spell. In an instant and a bright flash of light, Chuck is gone. Locked away just as Amara once was.

“Did it work? Is he gone?” Sam asks.

“It worked,” Michael says. There’s a shift in his expression. “Thank you.”

“Adam?” Dean says, relieved.

Adam smiles at him and then at Sam. And then he and Michael are gone.

“Locking Chuck away must’ve brought everyone back,” Sam says, a huge smile spreading across his face.

“Dean?” A familiar voice calls out from across the barn.

Dean whips around to see Cas standing there, the moon illuminating the perfect features of his face.

“Cas?” Dean says, sprinting towards him as if he couldn’t get there fast enough.

“What happened? I don’t know how I got-,” Cas is interrupted by the crash of Dean’s lips against his.

Dean tangles his fingers in Cas’ hair, kissing him so deeply, you would guess he’d been planning it for years.

They finally break apart to catch their breath. Dean is acutely aware of the fact that Jack and Sam are still in the barn with them, but in this moment, he can’t find it in him to care about anything else.

“I love you too, Cas. I’m in love with you. I have been for as long I can remember. I’m sorry I never said anything, I just didn’t think…I was afraid if I let myself…,” he can’t seem to find the right words to say. “I didn’t want it to be used against us, so I just tried to bury it. I’m sorry. I should’ve told you.”

Castiel just smiles at him. He never needed Dean to say it back because just loving Dean was enough. But hearing those words come from Dean’s lips, the vulnerability in his shaky voice, he feels whole.


End file.
